February 1, 2009

Exfoliating and Manicures (Or Buttface and the Nail Filer)

Tonight we stopped for a bite to eat before we went home and my wife was talking to one of the girls about something that I wasn't really paying attention to. I was only half listening until I heard my wife say something like, "I don't think your Dad heard about that. Shh."
Naturally it was too late, they had caught my attention. My wife and my two daughters looked at each other, deciding if they were going to share. The girls screamed, "No!" My wife disagreed.

Last night Lois and the girls were organizing the 'Girls Only Bathroom'. They had emptied out all the drawers and cabinets and they had spread everything out so they could sort it and put it back away. (Hmm?)

At some point Lois looked over at one of the girls who was standing there filing her nails and yelled out in a surprised voice, "Unnamed Child No. 1, stop that. What are you doing?"

"Filing my nails," my daughter said.

"Do you know what that is? Put that down!" my wife said.

"What?" my daughter asked. "What is it?"

"That's the pumice stone I use to clean the toilets."

My daughter started smiling. Big grin across her face.

"What's so funny?" my wife asked.

"Ask Unnamed Child No. 2 what she does with it," she grinned.

Unnamed Child No. 2 was practically speechless at that point, eyes wild as she pawed at her face.

It turns out that she thought it was for making skin soft and she had been running it over her face gently very nearly every day for God knows how long. "It makes my skin soft," she said. "Sometimes I use it on my feet, too."

Now I don't know whether to kiss them or throw them away.

8 comments:

Krëg said...

HA! Instant classic story.
Perchance did you guys consider getting ANOTHER pumice stone for more hygienic uses?

Something Happened Somewhere Turning said...

Who knew the many other advantages? Exfoliating. Nail Filing. Toe Grout. E-gads!

LarryG said...

talking to the kids is so enlightening, better ask them if they have using your toothbrush for any special projects :)

tkdmama said...

I laughed so hard I thought I was going to pee my pants!!

*mary* said...

Oh no!
I remember my little brother coming through the house one time when he was about two, and he had the toilet brush brushing his hair with it. Ughh.

Debra said...

What a funny story! Daughters will never cease to be amusing!

Lilly said...

Oh that is hilarious. Poor girl how will she live this down. It is one of those stories that will follow her at every famiy celebration for years to come. I know, I have many such stories.

Something Happened Somewhere Turning said...

TK...sorry!

*Mary* Too funny. Your parents kept him right?

Deb, they certainly are.

Lilly...I am pretty sure the girl's uncle will remind them about this every holiday.

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