October 1, 2009

O Happy Dagger

The other day I came home from work after a 12 hour shift. It was Saturday and the girls and their friends were gathered around the T.V. set singing karaoke songs to the PS2 SingStar. It was just after 6:00 p.m. I don't have any idea how long they were there before I got home.
About an hour later they asked me if the neighbor girl could spend the night.
"I don't care," I said.
"Yes!" They shouted and ran away.
At 8:00 p.m. they were all still singing. Not smooth-flowing melodies either, but sharp raspy high-pitched shrieks that blended and merged into a cacophony of 30 songs sung at the same time. If I closed my eyes it almost sounded like Hawkwinds "Sonic Attack."
At 9:00 p.m. I glanced upstairs with a scowl on my face. Maybe worse. Maybe it was a look that resembled something like pain. Like I might have just hit my finger with a hammer.
At 10:00 p.m. I was ready to be put down. I now understood why dogs howled when they heard noises that they couldn't stand.
At 10:05 p.m. I told Lois I was dying. She laughed and said it didn't bother her. "They're just having fun."
"Dude, they've been singing for 4 hours. STRAIGHT!"
Tick-Tock, Tick-Tock, Tick-Tock.
At 10:30 p.m. Lois told the girls that it was time to stop.
I thought that I would cry.

Tonight the girls told me there wasn't any school tomorrow and they asked me if the neighbor girl could spend the night.
"I don't care." I said.
At 8:00 p.m. they started singing. I turned the T.V. up so I could hear what Lois and I were watching.
At 9:00 p.m. they were still singing. Again, I turned the T.V. up so Lois and I could hear what we were watching.
At 10:00 p.m. Lois shouted. "All right girls, that's enough. Find something else to do."

I need to learn how to do that.

--"O happy dagger! This is thy sheath; there rust and let me die."  Romeo and Juliet


Laoch of Chicago said...

Someday once they have sold millions of cd's as part of a female super-group they will look back and laugh that you thought they were terrible.

*mary* said...

Hilarious! I have so much to look forward to, don't I?

Also, I have to give you extra credit points for incorporating Hawkwind into this post. Hahaha. I love it.

razorsandvines said...

This made me laugh right out loud through the entire thing!

kristine said...


thanks for that.

and...good luck with the next - what - 6 or 7 years?

Pop and Ice said...

Beware of groups of girls and music and overnights - they will exhaust you!

Something Happened Somewhere Turning said...

That would be sweet, but I'm not so sure that I like the idea of a super-group for a career choice. Sounds like it could be trouble.

For some reason Hawkwind was the first group I could think of.

It is pretty funny in hindsight.

Thanks for the good luck. I have a feeling it is going to be a long several years where they are concerned.

Pop and Ice,
I should know that by now.

Debra W said...

Yes, you do! Don't worry though. My husband will sit through any amount of torture that our daughters are willing to put him through. I think it's a "daddy's little girls" thing!



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